My aunt’s voice bellowed from the front porch before the door even opened, as my heartbeat raced with the consistency of a Cuisinart mixer on high. Once her heavy foot landed inside the entryway, I stumbled over my two left feet, trying to find a conspicuous place to hide. My feet usually shuffled their way underneath the kitchen table faster than a wild turkey on the opening day of hunting season.
Obviously, I was hiding, but I knew I couldn’t conceal myself forever.
As a child, her presence frightened me. Her demeanor terrified me. But what left the most stinging trauma was her passion to argue.
I have no problem with people who argue, whether it is arguing for a living, such as an attorney, or in general conversation. The problem lies with wasting energy, battling over almost everything.
I can still picture the moment when the visit turns dark.
Since she was family, we all suffered through her loud outbursts and opinionated battles. It could be something as trivial as the tastiest ice cream ever made is…
I learned to live with the unpleasantness and personality type as through life we all encounter this bulldozing type of personality. I actually thank her for helping me understand what brings me peace and what steals my peace.
Is life measured by the amount of times you stood up to fight or is life much more than that?
When I refer to choosing your battles, I am referring to being selective of confrontations and arguments that you choose to get involved in. Meaning that instead of fighting every problem, save your energy and time for only what truly matters to you.
difference? Will your insight help another person? Ask yourself these questions. Decide what is most important to you and let go of the rest.
Peace rates high on my survival scale, I choose a direction of peace; unless my opinion can make a difference in another person’s life or preserve my own health and safety.
Please don’t get me wrong. I have stood up for what I believe in, but I can count my battles on my one hand.
Why is it important to choose your battles?
For me, confrontations make me physically ill. Others love the confrontation; love the drama. I’ve had enough drama in my life to last me a lifetime and peace reigns in my world.
Not everything in this life is important. Before entering into a battle ask yourself if your opinion is going to matter ten or twenty years from now. If not, focus on the long term – focus on the essential matters in your life.
We are on this earth for a short visit and disputing senseless battles take up your valuable time and energy. Sometimes being victorious is not the most important aspect in life, but making the best use of your time while here on earth can do wonders for you.
When you look back on your life, will you see a life filled with petty arguments and time wasted or will you see a meaningful life spent only on the positive options – working through the things that mattered most to you?
Personalities differ and we are all made of different stuff. Our differences are what makes the world go around, but ask yourself what truly matters to you – your peace or your opinion.
You may be pleasantly surprised if you make some small changes on the choices you make.
After all, it is your life and no one will do it for you.